Lifting my life into science makes the day easier.
Tomorrow I wake up and look over my room like I haven’t in a long time. My eyes will scan over all of my belongings, tracking for any needful things, attempting to pluck them from the jumble of gold edged fairy tale mirrors, tins of oil paints, lite-bright paraphernalia, and metal lunchboxes full of photographs, ticket stubs, and birthday cards. There will be something almost essential that I leave behind, it’s a given, but that will not stop my gritty gazed morning search of the premises.
This morning I spent in a half aware nightmare of nasty dreaming and tidying. My body is in such need of dreamscapes freedom that it was unshakable for hours. I was aware and up and moving, but couldn’t shut off the narrative, the slew of images. Synthasia in the way I picked up a scarf of saffron silk to the feeling of rough gravel in the palms of my hands, how adding it to the windowsill heap of fabric threaded through with a man telling me to run, the helicopters were coming, the searchlights would pick me out too easily. My need for healing rest is becoming slightly dangerous. In a very real way, I am flying to California to sleep.
please world, let five days be enough.